I believe that relational love is the most profound way to experience oneself in spite of the fact that it can sometimes be the place where the most painful personal issues can arise.
Often people are unaware that the way they think or operate in the world can directly influence the quality of their relational life because they’re too stuck inside their behaviors and beliefs to have a clear, objective perspective. As an impartial onlooker into the workings of your relationship, I can help you identify what’s actually happening and assist you in developing more self-awareness around each person’s part in the dynamic, ultimately taking responsibility for yourself and your behavior. Working integrally with couples I customize treatment to address such issues as relational loneliness, misunderstanding, power struggles, unresolved conflict or constant bickering, sexual boredom, infidelity or mistrust, life phase issues, parenting styles, or issues with in-laws and family. We work at breaking through barriers that keep you separate and stagnant such as chronic negativity or criticism, defensiveness or bullying, or an inability to be genuine or truthful. I challenge my couples to engage in a new way of relating to each other where they have to give up on assumptions, expectations and the need to be right that are keeping them deadlocked. By identifying strengths and remembering what it is you loved about each other in the first place, lasting and meaningful change can occur. It isn’t easy work. I require a commitment to honesty, steadfast self-responsibility, and a willingness to remain in the process.
Through our work together, you can expect to:
- Increase closeness and connection
- Find ways to relate more effectively, increasing your chances of being heard and getting your needs met
- Break free of negative patterns and develop healthier ways of relating to each other
- Increase empathy for where your partner is coming from
- Navigate conflict and “perpetual problems” more effectively
- Learn how to apologize and forgive without resentment
- Stay close and connected to someone without losing yourself
- Develop skills that allow your relationship to continue to grow and improve, even after counseling has ended
- Learn to take life stressors a little more in stride
- Restore hope in your future together
I want my Lesbian, Gay, Bi and Queer clients to know that I can hold a strong space in which they will feel no judgment, and a deep respect and support for any lifestyle they choose or any relationship they want.